Hope for the Same-Sex Attracted by Ron Citlau

Author:Ron Citlau
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Homosexuality—Religious aspects—Christianity;Gays—Religious life;Church work with gays;REL012100;REL012110
ISBN: 9781441230874
Publisher: Baker Publishing Group
Published: 2017-02-18T00:00:00+00:00

5

The Gifts of Healing Communities and Christian Therapy

It was the summer of 1997. I had just begun to follow Jesus. I was earnest. I was also deeply in conflict about my sexual identity and needed to do something with the same-sex desires I was experiencing. And I was in bondage to gay pornography. I was living in Southern California, and a friend invited me to a group that was biblically based for those, like me, who dealt with sexual brokenness. So I went. This is how I was introduced to Andrew Comiskey and Desert Stream Ministries.1 Living Waters, the main program that Desert Stream trains local churches to run, saved my fledgling Christian life. It was there I was able to be honest about my sexual sin and conflict. It was there that I experienced the grace of God through intensive prayer. It was there that I found radical transformation that enabled me to embrace my God-given sexual identity and be a good gift to others, especially my wife.

During this time, I also found much good through competent Christian therapists. I needed places to talk about what was going on as it related to my sexual identity, process my journey, and think through the possibility of dating women. Most of the care I received was rooted in the church, and rightly so; but the amount of care I needed necessitated that I find other avenues for care. These good therapists provided it.

For some, such groups and the idea of therapy don’t sound appealing or necessary. And this might be true for some who struggle with same-sex attraction. But others of us will need healing communities and/or competent Christian therapists who can journey with us as we seek to follow Christ. In this chapter I want to first try to give a psychology of sexual identity; second, discuss the goal of healing communities and Christian therapy from a biblical perspective; third, give an overview of what a healing community and Christian therapist look like; and finally, give two practical on-ramps that you can provide as a leader or that you can take as a Christian same-sex struggler.

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